RIP Amanda Todd

[Young Grasshopper]

Thanks for expressing yourself honestly, although I am disappointed that you choose to call Amanda cowardly for the second time. Reguardless, if I were you, I might argue that she was selfish instead, because you can’t begin to presume the horrible degree of the life circumstances amoung all suicide victims, giving you the insight to call even 1 of them a coward. I understand your stance to side with the loved ones left behind, hell…. my brother has never been the same since my father’s death 27 years ago. However, some suicides take tremendous courage, not saying that’s the case with Amanda or my father, but isn’t it a little early to be pissing the word coward on her grave? Thats exactly what your doing, cause the thread is called RIP Amanda, and you have written coward here twice. Perhaps a new thread discussing opinions on suicide and the effects of those left behind would be more respectful. I’ve met you face to face Gargantua,  you may be opinionated, but you’re not disrespectful. I know what it’s like to stand alone and be surrounded by conformists that call you sick and demented because of your beliefs, and you are as brave as you are unapologetic, but I think your pinky toe is over the faded line. I do however, welcome you to be as different as I am in all our beliefs and opinions, it’s the only way to truly except people for what they are, especially if we can’t agree.

[Young Grasshopper]

@Gargantua:

I believe Robbie may have misunderstood my first post.

And as this is an incredibly serious conversation, I’ve PM’d robbie with my personal information so that if it’s needed, we can process this event as effectively as possible.

I’d rather deal with this discussion head on.  And if someone wants to take me to task on my stance for whatever reasons - they deserve every oppurtunity to do it, and be treated with respect.

Good on you, when ever someone has passed, respect is the foundation all conversation must be balanced on.

[Guest]

Ok I’m going to chime in here.  I’ve run into a few suicides in my day and seen it from a few angles.  What I think we should remember is to look at the situation from the point of view of this little girl.  To us as grown men, if we were to be ostracized we would probably just tell the people picking on us to piss off and move on.  But to a teenager who hasn’t formed a solid sense of her own identity yet, being the outsider can seem inescapable and unbearable.  The cutting behavior and any drug or alcohol abuse would be typical escapes.  We are left to wonder how much of her decision to do it was a) well thought out or impulsive, b) motivated by her need to escape her situation, c) meant to inflict pain or vengeance on her tormentors, and/or d) meant to inflict pain on her family and those who cared for her.  One more thing: the behavior of the young man who took advantage of her is really bad and his father should take him out to the woodshed for that.  Its a very very sad outcome all around.

[Young Grasshopper]

I recommend watching “Once Were Warriors”. The young girl in that film had very few options.

[Gargantua]

YG,

I take your comments to heart. Coward probably is the wrong word. I apologize for using it.

I don’t know that selfish is the right word either though…?  I’m going to need to think on it.

That jerk that slept with her derserves a fist in his face, not to mention the guy that flashed her tits all over the net.  If you were half a man you’ld hold him for me.

Robbie, from a few things I heard last night I believe this just came true…

[Young Grasshopper]

You’re a big man G.

[special forces]

@Gargantua:

YG,

I take your comments to heart. Coward probably is the wrong word. I apologize for using it.

I don’t know that selfish is the right word either though…?  I’m going to need to think on it.

Maybe desperate is the word?

[Guerrilla Guy]

I would submit, misguided. She was too young to understand the broad sweeping ramification of her actions, and based on what she had perceived from culture, she felt that suicide was the only option. It was hardly right, but she didn’t know of any other option, so she was misguided in her solution.

GG

[Young Grasshopper]

I hear now that the bullies continue to torment her even in death, by posting rude comments on her memorial face book page, comments like “I’m glad she’s dead”. Seems like Amanda wasn’t the only one misguided.

[Canuck12]

Glad to see you’re coming around a bit G. I hope you continue to.

@Gargantua:

Am I still going to have to feel sorry for Amanda, if this leads to her mother killing herself? Because it might?  And then how are we all supposed to feel for Amanda’s brother. Do we let him kill himself too and say it was ok by giving our sympathy?  Answer me that question Robbie? Personally I think the answer is NO.

This quote made me pretty sick though. Because my answer is absolutely yes. If this tragedy lead to her mother or her brother killing themselves, I would feel a lot more fucking sorry, for everyone involved. It would never make me turn on her because she has no control of what they do with their lives. Would those be cowardly and reprehensible acts as well? Or would they be the fault of Amanda? If in the turmoil of this her mother commits suicide will you call her mother a coward too? Think about what you’re saying.

I get your point about suicide negatively affecting others but COME ON! Let’s try not to loose sight of the fact that a little girl DIED. Some people will deal with grief in their own ways but it is insane to think that anyone else suffered as much as she did. Someone lost a daughter, someone lost a sister, SHE LOST HER LIFE.

And clearly no-one has yet been affected as much as SHE was.

God-willing, no one will.

[robbie358]

It makes me happy in some small way to see you guys support me on this.

I don’t know why this affects me so much, I never even met her.  Maybe it’s because I never will.  I’ll never get the chance to hug her or tell her how brave she was.

Thanks for the invitation to talk, Gar.  I’ll take you up on that someday when I have the chance to reflect a bit.

I’m 100% proof positive absolutely convinced of one thing.  I know this isn’t what she wanted.  I’m sure she’d rather go the beach and play volleyball with me tomorrow morning than be dead.  “The dead know only one thing, it is better to be alive.”